Staying Motivated

While I really do like school, it is very hard for me to remain motivated. I have a naturally lazy spirit about me, especially when I am home. I get lost in the computer games and watching television. It is very hard for me to remain focused. If something is even a little bit challenging for me I can lose focus easily and therefore lose interest. I don't know why I am this way. I have found through the years that I begin a project and if it takes me a really long time to complete it I will just drop it and move on to the next project. I can't figure it out. Right now I know I have all this work to catch up in my ENGL135 class and for whatever reason I am procrastinating. I know I will get it done but there is another part of me that just doesn't care. I decided to go back to school because of all the outside influences around me saying it was just the right thing to do. I also decided to go back to school because of my fiance, Michael. He has several degrees and I felt obligated to be able to contribute something to our relationship by going back to school. Sometimes I feel like I am really doing well and enjoying it and other times I just feel the academia is just not my thing. I hope I will find a way to remain focused because I really do want to finish this and get my degree.

Running into old friends

I ran into an old friend today and I can't tell you how happy it made me during my trip home. Her name is Dori and she is the wife of my old boss, Rabbi David-Seth Kirshner. I have blogged about Rabbi Kirshner before, mentioning how I have been blessed to work for some amazing people in my time. When you meet amazing people in your life it is so important to cherish the relationship. Even if you don't see one another for many years, be thankful you made that connection when you did. Dori and David are two of those types of people. I cannot tell you how wonderful it was to see her just walking down 40th Street in NYC. I think both she and I had the feeling of "wow, this is wonderful."
I am glad to have met and made connections with some great people in my life and when I get the chance to run into them again, for whatever reason, I believe this brings an overwhelming joy back into my heart. It reminds me of just how truly blessed I am.

It's Official...a close up view of the Falls

OH MY GOD...I must say I was almost speechless. Both Michael and I were in AWE! I consider myself to be a water loving person and I only fell in love with it more once I saw the falls. The water is so beautiful it made me want to jump in. It looked like thick crystal in some places. It was so loud, roaring like a hungry lion, as vicious as a thunderous storm, but yet peaceful and mezmerizing. Michael and I both referred to this as, "Mother Nature at one of her most violent and yet most comforting moments." I have never really experienced this type of serenity and tranquility.

I don't know if it was the sun or if it was psychological, but I was thirsting for water for the entire trip...and I am usually not a water drinker. It was funny but everywhere I went I just wanted some "ice cold water."

Our first official day at the Falls we went on various tours. First was Journey Behind the Falls. You get to walk in concaves behind the falls and hear the water right in front of you, almost close enough to touch. Following that we went to watch the 4D movie, "Niagara's Fury." That was a lot of fun because the screen is around the entire room (in a circle) and the view is 3D but the 4D comes into play when they splash water on you, the floor shakes, lights flash and thunder sounds. Next it was on to Maid of the Mist. This boat takes you past the American Falls and then directly into the mist of Canada's Horseshoe Falls. The mist, at times, is like a heavy rainfall. Everyone on the boat was drenched by the end of our boat trip.

You can take pictures all along the ride passing the American Falls, but as soon as you approach Canada's Horseshoe Falls you have to put your camera away unless it is an underwater camera because the falling mist is just like a rainstorm. I should have tried to put a plastic bag over it and take pictures anyway, but I was just excited to be there. The boat drives up right into the center of the horseshoe and stays there for a few minutes, making sure everyone experiences the mist. Then it makes a quick u-turn and returns us to the pier just across from the American Falls. The weather was warm and the water was welcoming.

After our trip on the Maid of the Mist, Michael and I decided it was time for some lunch. So it was off to the Hard Rock Cafe for some nachos and cold beer. After lunch we decided to relax and go visit the Bird Aviary. We arrived too late to feed the birds and other animals but we did get to hold a real alligator and Michael got to hold an 8-10 ft. Burmese Python. An exciting end to a glorious day.

Our first day at Niagara Falls

We departed for our trip to Niagara Falls, Ontario Canada on Tuesday night about 11:30pm. We arrived, Wednesday, May 19th at about 7:30am. Obviously we had not really seen any of the Falls yet but I was so excited to have finally arrived. We were truly exhausted.

While I had called the hotel prior to our arrival to confirm various things regarding payment, obviously when you arrive there is always a different story. Isn't that always the case? I don't think there has ever been a time where I have gotten the same information over the phone as I have when getting to a place in person.

Finally, even after a long night of consistent driving with only 2 breaks along the way, we found the energy to get our first glimpse of the Falls. Michael and I were in awe. Everything was so beautiful. I could not wait to see them up close.

After a quick view we arrived in our room to take a long needed rest. I was so anxious to be there I don't know how I managed to close my eyes and get to sleep. After a few hours of rest we got up and went to dinner at Mandarin. I have never been there and was looking forward to some Chinese buffet. I was trying not to run Michael ragged but I really wanted to see the Falls and could almost not wait till the following morning. Of course we did get a nice view from our hotel room window however.

So, keeping in mind that I did not want to annoy my honey by driving him crazy, I tried desperately to put a cap on my energy level and just remind myself, "patience and faith Lisa, you will see the Falls up close in the morning."

Off to Niagara Falls, Ontario Canada

I am so excited. My fiance and I are leaving for Niagara Falls tonight. Work and class today, then home to finish packing and off on our long drive to Canada.
The last time I was out of the country I was 15. I took a cruise to Bermuda with my mom. This trip will actually be my first out of the country trip as an adult. I finally get to use my passport.
We are celebrating my birthday with a wonderful look at nature at its best. One of my friends went to Niagara Falls and came home to say she realized just how insignificant our daily problems are. When you have the chance to witness these majestic falls you realize just how big the world is. The world is so big and contains so many wonderous sights. When you don't get the chance to travel and see these amazing things you can lose sight of what really matters. I hope this trip does exactly that for me...helps me to realize there are much bigger things in life and we need to appreciate all that we have so we can truly become better people.

I really hate BUGS

There are some bugs I have no problem with killing, simply because I hate them...flies, mosquitoes, roaches...but when it comes to water bugs...EEEEEEEEEEEE...I scream and run. Over the weekend a waterbug got into my apartment. Oh how I hate waterbugs. I wish I could have caught it on camera because I am sure it would have been a laugh for everyone. There was a bag on the table and I moved it to throw it away, well out came a huge waterbug. I screamed and backed up. Of course my skin was crawling with just the thought of that bug being near me, not to mention, in my house. I gathered up the courage to figure out where it went because it HAD TO BE KILLED. Thank goodness my son was home. I managed to move things around on the table and it ran and it actually flew off the table. Wel that was it. I couldn't restrain myself and screamed the loudest scream I have heard from myself in a long time. My son came running because he thought something was really wrong. Once the bug hit the floor my son stomped it. I think I shook for a good 20 minutes even after it was dead and removed completely from my apartment. I don't even like to flush dead bugs down the toilet or put them in the garbage. The bug has to be removed completely from my home. So my son got a papertowel, picked it up and threw it down the garbage shoot in the hallway. I HATE BUGS....ESPECIALLY WATER BUGS! But we all had a good laugh from the whole experience. LOL

Take life seriously...it will bite you in the ass eventually.

As a young adult I took too many chances in life and now that I am trying to clean up my life and do better, all those wrong things I did when I was younger are biting me in the ass. When we are young we think we are indestructable. But what doesn't hurt you then will surely hurt you later on.

I am in the midst of trying to get my driver's license. I had a permit many years ago and I have to say I was not very responsible. Well all those stupid things are now catching up to me and I am paying dearly. Not only with stress but with dollar signs. I was so happy last week when I passed my learner's permit test and was given my temporary permit. Then tonight after coming home from class I checked my mail to find a letter from the DMV. Oh how I hate the DMV. Apparently there are some more skeletons in my closet than I remembered. I thought I had cleared everything and paid all possible violations. Low and behold I have more to deal with.

The message I guess I would like to get across here is: Take life seriously, be responsible as a young person and know that what goes around will come around. If it doesn't come out in the wash it surely will come out in the rinse. Behave and act responsibly.

And the countdown begins - getting the chance to finally use my passport.

I will be 43 on May 22nd and only got a passport last year. I have spent 42 years of my life never leaving my own country. Think about the people that have never left their city or state. Finally, I get the chance to know what it feels like to cross a country border. My honey, Michael, is taking me to Niagara Falls for my birthday. I have heard so many amazing things about Niagara Falls, especially the awesomeness (if that is a word) of the falls. They are so loud and so big and so amazing.

Some people take for granted that they have the ability to travel all over the world. Here I sit, grateful for the chance to finally just drive across the Canadian border. When I was 15 my mother took me to Bermuda but then you did not need a passport, only a birth certificate (especially if you were a minor and traveling with your parents, and on a cruise). Since then I have never been out of the country. I plan to spend this mini vacation taking lots of photographs, enjoying the splendor of the falls, and trying not to spend too much money.

We leave on May 18 and return on the 23rd. So the countdown begins...I will post about my trip when I get back and include plenty of photos.

Some Great People

I am currently employed at American Associates, Ben-Gurion University of the Negev (AABGU). I have been working here since November 1, 2007. I am the Programs and Development Assistant. I started my tenure at AABGU as just the Programs Assistant and progressed to the Programs and Development Assistant only because in the non-profit realm most employees wear many hats and are given several responsiblities in the name of trying to utilize each person for their skills and to save money for the organization. I came from another non-profit organization by the name of The Jewish Theological Seminary where I was an Administrative Assistant. I worked there assisting various supervisors as well, such as the Director of Special Events, the Senior Director of Institutional Advancement, the Director of Major Gifts, Director of New York Region and the Director of New England Region.
I enjoy my job and have to say that I have worked with some extraordinary people. One such person was Rabbi David-Seth Kirshner. He was the Senior Director of Institutional Advancement at JTS. David is an exceptional boss. He knows how to manage a department because he utilizes people for their strengths as opposed to trying to get someone to do a job well when they don't know what they were doing. David always motivated me to want to be better. I have also had the opportunity to work with Harriet Winer. She is a consultant at AABGU. She came to AABGU to help the Development team. Harriet is kind, warm and always nurturing. My next best boss, Gabe Most, the Director of Programs and Events at AAABGU is amazing. While he is very meticulous and extremely organized, he challenges me to always be better. Not necessarily through motivation, but Gabe comes across to me as a tester. His presentation always seems to test me to do things as well organized as he does. I have learned so much while at AABGU and hope to be there a long time.
Most of us always remember those horrible people we have worked for and are happy to no longer be working for them. I have a number of them in mind right now...but I would rather remember those people I consider to be exceptional. The energy we put into the negative things in life takes so much out of us. If we take the time to remember those good people we worked for and learned from it will help us to be better people and better employees.

Never Say "Never"

I would never....

When thinking of this phrase or hearing someone say it, I have to be critical. Never? Really? I am just as guilty of using this phrase as anyone else. It is simply very common for people to say, "I would never..." because most people speak from where they are at. Nobody knows the future or what life has in store for them. Circumstances and situations can change a person's perspective on his/her "I would never..." comment.

Let's take a highly controversial statement for instance, "I would never have an abortion." Now, while this is a very positive statement and exhibits a woman's strong beliefs about abortion, it also leaves room for other thoughts. Well what if she were raped? Might she then reconsider her statement?

If the conditions are right and circumstances present themselves at just the right time, most human beings will reconsider their original position. We all have certain concrete moral and ethical standards. We all believe that we will live up to those standards without question. However, our philosophy can change in a matter of seconds if the right condition presents itself.

Life is always changing. As we age, we grow and we attain more experience and knowledge. We begin to have different perspectives on life. While it is a good thing to set standards for ourselves and those around us, be careful when saying, "I will never..." While I would love to think my morals and ethical beliefs are written in stone...trust me...based on the circumstance and condition, I can easily change my mind if I am pushed to the end of my rope.

"I Love the DMV...NOT!

It is amazing how quickly you get taken care of at any city office when you have to pay them. However, when you need something from them, you can put your hand on your ass and wait, and for very lengthy periods of time at that.

I arrived at the NYS DMV office on 34th Street at about 9:30am yesterday morning. I was going to take my written driver's permit test. The office was rather empty so I thought I would not be there that long. Well, I was so wrong.

I proceeded to the Written Tests line where I waited, along with over 20 other people, to just submit our applications, sign forms and take a photo. I stood there for what felt like 20-30 minutes before reaching the front of the line. It is amazing but at first there was only one person working the line, then, out of nowhere came 3 other people to work the line. Oh but that quick movement of customers/clients, was only wishful thinking because it only lasted for the time it took for the DMV employees to take care of about 10 people. Then I think they called an early break or maybe an emergency bell went off somewhere, but those people disappeared and were nowhere to be found.

Ok, so now I am on the second line, waiting to take my photograph and submit my identification. That had to have taken another 30-40 minutes even with only 8 people in front of me. Finally, it is my turn. I submitted all the proper ID, took my photo, and signed in the proper places. Now..."go sit down and wait...good luck on your exam." So I proceed to the 2 1/2 rows of very uncomfortable wooden benches they have for you to sit on where you wait to be called to take your test. However, the 15 people who were just tested had been finished for the past 20 minutes and were just waiting in their testing seats for their results. Oh, wait a minute, I think I hear a little voice calling someone's name. Finally, after another 10-15 minutes they were ready to give those people their results and move on to the next batch of test takers, my group.

Yeah, we are called to line up, take a pen and a pencil. The security guard politely asks, "Are you taking your test in English or Spanish?" So we respond, to only be asked again by the diligent young clerk behind the desk giving out the exams. "Use the pen to print and sign your name. Use the pencil for the test." Great, I finally get to take the test.

If the test took me a whole 10 minutes to complete, that was a lot. But I was CONFIDENT I passed with flying colors. Six wrong out of twenty questions? I don't understand how anyone who simply takes the practice test online can fail this test? But, who am I to judge? Maybe those people don't even know the practice test exists online. Maybe those people don't have access to a computer? Maybe those people...?

Anyway, so now I am the first one done with the exam and ready to wait patiently to get my results...which will probably take another 30 minutes. Of course there is absolutely no systematic approach to anything at the DMV except when they are ready to take your money. I was the first one to finish the exam and the last one to get the results. Unlike any normal critical thinking individual, the "terribly bright" young lady behind the desk worked from the top of the pile instead of the bottom. Obviously she has nowhere else to go for the moment...hey she is at work already. So, the 30 minutes go by and finally a co-worker comes by to help out. Well, it doesn't necessarily mean anything will move any faster you know.

Needless to say I passed the test with 100%. Got my number and went to the larger section where you see all those A, B, C & D red numbers light up on the wall and go to one of the 25 windows to be served or serviced. Of course there were only 5 people in the A group ahead of me. I was called in within the next 10 minutes, gave the City of New York my $73.00 and walked out of the Department of Motor Vehicles with my new NYS Driver's Permit. Mind you the $73 I just paid covered the following charges:

$9.00 for an MCTD fee (don't know what that is)

$25.00 for a Photo Document Fee

$29.25 for a License Fee

and

$10.00 for an Application Fee

I wonder what the City of New York would do without all those fees? Mind you, the DMV had photo on record for me already that was only 2 yrs old from my non-driver's ID. Did they really have to charge me another $25.00 fee to take my photo again? Oh, wait, that might be the fee so they can make the photo document. But then what is the license fee for? And MCTD??? What's that all about.

So, to wrap this all up...I got there at 9:30 am and left around 12:30pm. Three hours to take a test that literally took me no longer than 10 minutes to finish. And another 10 minutes to pay for the test. That means I spent 2 hours and 10 minutes of waiting time. Trust me...I will make it my business to make sure I stay away from things that will cause me to visit the DMV, with the exception of taking my road test and getting my driver's license, and then the every 8-10 year renewal.

I love visiting the DMV....NOT!!!

I am truly blessed!

When you have something good, hold on to it, not too tightly, but be sure to secure it.

I was truly blessed the day I met my honey, Michael. In all my life I would never have imagined myself with such an amazing man. From the night of our first date I knew he was someone special. He was a complete gentleman and has been consistent with that all through these past 3 1/2 years. Michael is consistent about everything he does. He is critical and realistic. He does not get caught up in the idealisms of life.

During our first conversations I was hesitant to go on the first date because he was so educated. Michael has two masters degrees and is currently working on his PhD. All I had was a high school education. I immediately thought, as most people may think..."What are we going to have in common?" Michael put a hault to my thinking that way and immediately told me, "Just give me a good heart and character and we can take it from there." He never judged me based on my past or my education (or lack thereof). He simply wanted to know me for exactly who I am.

Michael is also an ordained minister. About two weeks into our relationship he invited me to attend a sermon he was giving at his church. Needless to say, I was truly overwhelmed. Who was I and what was I doing with this man? Why was he taking me into his life? I cried all the way home because I simply thought I didn't deserve him.

I spent 20 years of my first relationship with a man who did nothing for me. Oh sure, he taught me things and helped me with our two wonderful kids, but he did more to bring me down than he did to lift me up. John did not empower me to ever be better than I was. John passed away in August 2005. He was only 44 years old. Had he listened to me over the years and cleaned himself up, maybe he would still be alive today. However, that would mean I would probably still be with him and not with my wonderful Michael. I don't want to talk bad about the dead but John, as good as he was in some aspects, is better off where he is and so am I. One thing I never had the strength to do was to step away from our relationship or kick him out. I began to feel sorry for him instead of being in love with him.

So, here I sit today, in love with an amazing man who cooks, cleans, is educated and self motivated, ambitious, loving, kind, respectful and empowering. I finally see myself going places. Heck, I even enrolled in school to try to obtain my Bachelors in Business Administration from DeVry College of New York. I never saw myself going back to school when John was alive.

Michael and I are getting ready to go to Niagara Falls for my birthday in three weeks. Up until last year I never even owned a passport. Now, I am getting ready to leave the country. Then in September we are going to Nassau on a cruise, again needing a passport. The light at the end of the tunnel is finally starting to shine.

I am grateful every day for having Michael in my life. I try to always be mindful of taking advantage of that fact and never take him for granted. I don't know what I stepped in but I sure do know I am liking it.

Parking in Long Island City

It is needless to say that parking in New York City is a nightmare. I think anyone who owns a vehicle in NYC has experienced having their car ticketed and towed on more than one occasion. My fiance and I purchased a car just this past Wednesday, brought it home, and were happy to finally have a car to use when we want to go shopping, vacationing, to the movies, etc. However, on Thursday, not 24 hours after purchasing the vehicle, it was towed. Yes, the city became $185 richer because of our negligence to read the signs thoroughly and carefully. However, in LIC, especially on 10th Street, you practically need a grid on the street that speaks louder than the signs so conveniently placed behind big trees. From the corner of 40th Avenue coming into 10th Street about 15-20 feet you cannot park at all...simply "No Parking." From the point of that sign starts another rule for about another 15-20 feet which is "No Parking Monday & Thursday 8:30am - 10:00am. From that point on through the center of the block for about 20 feet there is another sign that says "No Parking 7am - 7pm Monday - Friday. The next sign goes back to the Monday & Thursday rule and from the corner in again is the No Parking at all sign.

When you haven't had a car for a number of years it is nerve racking to try to determine exactly where you can and cannot park. Considering my neighborhood is a highly residential area (the projects) you would love to think that it would be easier for us to have a place to park during the day while we are at work without having to worry about whether we are going to be ticketed or towed or without having to make someone else richer at our expense because we need to put the car in a lot or drive it to work and use those incredibly expensive parking garages. This simply adds a distaste to my love for NYC. As I continue to live here over the years I begin to hate NYC more and more. The rich are getting richer and the poor are staying poor. The system feeds off the impoverished more and more every day. Is there really an American Dream left for anyone?

We just keep working hard toward the dream of one day owning our own home with a garage and driveway where I can park my car any dang time of the day and not have to worry about whether it will be there when I wake up in the morning.

Welcome to my neighborhood

I was raised in Ridgewood, NY and spent most of my life there. I also lived in Maspeth. Currently I reside in Long Island City, NY in Queensbridge North housing projects. I have been living in LIC for about 8 years now. If I had it my way I would be back in Ridgewood just because I love that neighborhood so much and I have lots of memories there. It was not necessarily my choice to move to LIC.

About 9 yrs ago my family and I were evicted from our apartment in Ridgewood and found ourselves seeking support from the NYC shelter system. We spent 16 months in Harlem in a studio apartment that was a 13ft. x 18ft. in size. Imagine having 4 people trying to live in that size room for that period of time. I kept telling myself it was only temporary...and it was. At the end of our stay there, housing deemed us qualified for NYCHA housing. I remember the day I signed my lease as if it were yesterday.

We were kind of excited to finally be getting out of the shelter system but uneasy about where the city would place us. We went to the management office and were basically told, "either you take it or lose your benefits." While we were in the management office waiting to go see the apartment I remember a housing manager saying (loud enough for the entire department to hear), "Hey, did we get the police report from that shooting last night?" I began to cry. I have always lived in a rather safe neighborhood and now, due to circumstances beyond our control, we were being subjected to taking this apartment whether we liked it or not.

The apartment was very nice and much larger than the apartment we came from in Ridgewood. However, I was really scared for my children, their father and myself. I did not want to have to deal with the possiblity of neighborhood shootings. What if??? OMG. But, we had no choice. I remember hearing gun shots every weekend when we first moved in. I remember telling the kids to stay in the house after 10pm. While the location was prime, in that we had every bus and train possible for transportation to just about anywhere in NYC, and my transport to and from work would be cut in half, I really could not wait for the possibility to get back to Ridgewood.

Now, about 8 or 9 years later, I can honestly say the NYPD has significantly cleaned up my neighborhood and I can't remember the last time I heard a gunshot. My apartment is comfortable and clean and not the typical "projects apartment" people tend to think of when they hear those words. Due to the circumstances of the economy these days I am rather happy to be living in NYCHA housing. My rent is based on my income. Heat, hot water, gas and electric are included, and I get to have a washing machine in my apartment. We have three bedrooms for a rent rate rarely found anywhere in NYC except housing. I guess you can say I am grateful NYCHA was there for us in our time of need.

I still can't wait to one day get out of NYC entirely and live in the country. Somewhere you can smell fresh cut grass, hear the birds chirping, and simply enjoy what nature has to offer. One day I hope this will happen for us.